Octuplets, Oh My!

Fine print first: I'm a single mom with no family nearby except my ex husband, and our son has special needs. Thus I am always going to be quick to say, "It can be much harder than you imagine to raise a child." I hoped for two, had one that was challenging, then separated and said, "Wow, this is really all i can handle if I wish to do justice to this child that I CHOSE to bring to Earth." So he's an Only.

Meanwhile back at the ranch, some folks think about "having babies" and their right to do so -- without ever considering they are actually "raising children towards adulthood" and taking on huge responsibilities. Thirteen-year old girls in record numbers want to have a baby -- some are even MORE short-sighted and say they want a "baby BUMP" like Jamie Lynn Spears. They never say they want to "bring another human onto the Earth" or "raise a child for 18 years to become a great world citizen." I have heard people say they plan to have 4 or 5 "because i can." WTF kinda attitude is that?!

One of my biggest complaints about mainstream American culture and ideology is that we are taught to scream for our "rights" -- while ignoring the responsibilities that logically are married to those rights. "My right to freedom of speech" to many Americans means they can spout off mindlessly or insult anyone. What about their responsibility to use their voice for the good of humanity in ways small and large? To speak truth? To spread kindness and honesty with that voice? Is that what motivates our most vocal "free speech advocates" like Larry Flynt or "Mancow"?

Similarly the debates about things like family planning seem to focus on EITHER rights OR responsibilities. And of course that very American concept of "It's none of your business!" If someone wishes to collect dozens of Care Bears I say go nuts. You don't need to justify that, as the Bears are not dependent upon you to provide their human needs and protect their human rights. Seeing as they are not human...

However, having a baby on THIS planet means you don't just GET something. You become the primary agent through which the child's rights must be protected and needs must be met. And simply by being born, those little humans HAVE RIGHTS. So if you cannot protect those rights, including meeting basic human needs, in my opinion you do NOT have the right to bring them here as dependents of yours.

Call me a communist, but why should such a big decision that involves adding citizens to our human community become suddenly a completely private matter? Why SHOULDN'T people counsel and critique this decision? It is, in fact, OUR planet that has just gotten a tiny bit heavier. And hungrier.